Something Died – Quitting Heaven

I’m going back through old posts, lyrics and videos from Quitting Heaven’s past and discovered a few things that I’m going to repost here”":

Something Died…

“Yesterday, something died.  I think I know what and why.  I heard it take it’s last breath, and while it sat choking…I could only watch as it passed.  But I can’t say a word or repeat what I heard.  And without talking about it, I know I will never forget.

I should have known better, I thought I was old enough to know.  But here I sit, wondering how I can handle it.  And maybe I’m just an ass for letting something so small consume me…but…there it is.  Eating away.  And it is my own fault.  Some doors should forever remain closed.

I know that no one would ever understand even if I explained it all…how my world has died a little.  No one will even know that I cried…just a little.  Except whomever is reading this…I guess.  Someone is reading this…aren’t they?  Because I have to let someone, anyone know. Yesterday…something died.”

 

Connecting The Dots…

“Connecting the dots” is an interesting phrase…especially with recent events on my side. My simple understanding of the phrase was that it meant following a series events to get a complete (or near complete) picture. But after some sad things in my life…I’ve realized it means more.

You see…a “connect the dots” picture begins as nothing until you start at 1, and start drawing lines. If you can connect all the dots, you end up with a final picture that is difficult to dispute. A robot is a robot…a teddy bear is a teddy bear. But sometimes in life, you don’t have all the information required to connect all the dots. So you start at some number…lets say 2…and draw a line to 3. But if you are missing 4, you may then draw the next line from 5 to 6 and then to 7. In the end you either have a picture that you can’t quite understand…or…you have enough dots connected that, even though it isn’t a perfect picture…it is obviously still a robot or a teddy bear.

And sometimes…that really sucks. Especially when you were hoping against hope that it was something else. But there it is, staring you in the face.

 

Fire Destroys…

And as you watch another burn, falling uncontrollably from the sky, you want so bad to reach out and try to help…even when they don’t seem to care. Far too often, you end up burning your hands…as I have. So what can you do? Just watch as something you love plummets and ultimately crashes into a burning heap, in the dirt? How is that friendship, or caring? But your hands are tied and in the end, that is all you can do. And as much as you wish to protect them, you find yourself having to protect yourself as well…from both the fire…and the pain of the loss you will soon experience. I guess the only words that can be said are…”Good-bye”…and then you move on. Like nothing happened, like it meant nothing. But I will always be here if you need a friend.

 

What a Fool I Have Been…

It may have been for all the right reasons,
And I might have been wrong, all along,
But in the end, after all the lies, it is a fool that I’ve become.

But the person which I strive to be,
That requires and consumes so much of me,
Is the person that I’ve always been…so a fool, I will surely be again.